Dear Child of Divorce,

I know where you’ve been and I know right now where you stand. Through it all, be reminded of this: You are strong. You don’t have the answers and that is okay. And, you are not alone. 

Your heart will always long for a mother and father under one roof. Even years after your heart has been healed, there will still be moments where it is okay to cry. In the midst of your pain, may you know that you are being refined into a pillar of compassion. Though most of it doesn’t make sense, know that you are being held in the arms of Abba, who is both mother and father, who understands your beating heart in ways that no one else can. 

Life will not be easy. In fact, life isn’t easy for anyone, but you bear a unique burden that is often not known by the world you walk through. You can’t explain to the streets you step on that you live your life constantly caught in the middle, thrust between homes with a tension that never ceases.

Celebrations are jovial, but they also bring about grief, for the reminder that one home became two, and that on that desired forgotten day, your heart broke in half. The shadow of divorce is present at graduations, weddings, momentous occasions of various kinds.

Wounds once healed will be opened again. And, while you try to be quiet, and tell the world that you are just fine, know this: it’s okay not to always be strong. 

Yet, in those moments, where life becomes numb, and your world feels as though it’s no longer your own, be reminded that there is a promise that all things will be redeemed. 

Caught in the middle, you may never feel that you are enough for your parents. To please one is to dismay another, but do not be grieved by this sobering reality. 

You are enough.

Not because of who you are, but because of who God is. Even if you fall wayward, you are his beloved. 

You don’t have to prove yourself. You don’t have to listen to lies. You don’t have to measure up to anyone else’s standards. You don’t have to be afraid to love. You don’t have to give up hope on marriage or having a family of your own one day. 

You are enough.

Healing comes in time. It will get easier, though there will still be nights where inevitable tears remind you of the words that haunt your memory “we are getting a divorce.”

Let your life not be full of bitterness, but gratefulness for the breath you take, day by day. Let your life be used to bring glory to Abba. Let the pain be turned into art. Let the unknown be turned into hope. And, let your heart know that not for one moment are you ever alone.

You are stronger than you’ll ever know.